Less Random Thoughts on Infinity Wars

Stormbreaker belongs to Beta Ray Bill! If he’d had it, then he wouldn’t have been a face on the Grandmaster’s tower!

*ahem* Spoilers.

Full disclosure: I saw all of the following in my first go-round with the movie but elected not to write about them. I thought that maybe I was being hyper-critical. But on the 2nd go-round I was just as annoyed as during the first viewing.

So, here goes.

Thanos

Thanos’s plan is still stupid. In talking to Gamora he says something along the lines of: twenty years ago, I murdered half your planet’s people. Now it’s a paradise.

His next line should be: And I’ll be going back to wipe out another 50% when they start consuming too many resources again.

Or maybe: When I get the 6th McGuffin, I will wipe out 50% of those who remain on your planet which means I won’t have to go back there for a much longer period of time. Gosh, I hope I’m still alive by then!

Or, wait, is Thanos immortal? Gamora should ask: So, Daddy, just how many resources have YOU consumed in your long life? Hmm? What about the planet of the Groot you wiped out to make all that quilty smooth Charmin? We’ll send that old dude from those ancient commercials after you….

And why is it half? Why not kill 80%? 90%? Burn ’em down to minimum viable population? Presumably any of those options would preserve still more resources. But, I guess 50% just rolls off the tongue better.

Gamora and Thanos

Thanos has a spaceship. And a cool teleport power. Why didn’t he and Gamora just teleport to the top of the mountain where the soulstone was kept by Tantalus? Er, Red Skull.

I don’t mind the “must sacrifice something you love” trope, only how dense Gamora was in the moment. For such a savvy character, why didn’t she see it coming?

I get that she doesn’t think Thanos loves anyone so what happens in the movie makes sense from that perspective, but we also know that she loves (and hates) Thanos.

Consider that Tantalus said that to gain the soulstone you had to sacrifice something you love. (Or maybe Tantalus said “what you love most?” I don’t recall exactly.)

Since Gamora loves Thanos and b/c she’s so savvy, what if she was just slightly quicker on the uptake than Thanos and uses that microsecond to try shoving him over the edge? And let’s say she almost gets him, but he uses the power of the McGuffins to screw with reality thus gaining the upper hand and realizing his goal.

Does that rob the scene of weepy Thanos? Or does he remain sad/grieving because he loves Gamora all the more for fighting so damn hard. She is a firecracker, right?

I don’t know if my scenario would’ve worked better or not, but imo its truer to her character than what does transpire. A little tinkering with the prior scenes could’ve set up all of the above.

Thor

As enjoyable as his scenes with the rabbit were, I’m annoyed that he survives the blast of a neutron star but gets his ass kicked by Thanos. Does that mean Thanos is as powerful as a neutron star? Or is the plot convenience more powerful still?

And when the heck did Thor get *that* strong? He got pounded by the Hulk like 5 seconds ago…and Hela….

And did Thanos really leave Thor to die in the purple fire? Really? Why didn’t he wring his neck like Loki? (Who died in a really dumb way.) Moreover, you’re telling me that Thor doesn’t know the difference between a rabbit and raccoon? Really?

And when Thor takes Beta Ray Bill’s rightful weapon, plot-point-dropping Eitri says that the weapon oh-so-conveniently incorporates the power of the Bifrost.

(Many sentences start with “and.”)

So…why does Thor go to Wakanda to battle the zerglings? And, for that matter, how did Thor know to go there?

And if he knew to go to Wakanda, why didn’t he also know to go to Titan to fight Thanos? If he’d gone there, he could’ve gotten the glove off.

Maybe I’m wrong, but it seemed like those two fights were happening at roughly the same time.

The Fight on Titan

Starlord’s “loss of control” when Gamora’s death was revealed to him felt forced either b/c of the acting or the writing or both or b/c the business plan required Thanos to not lose in the first movie.

Wouldn’t it have been cooler if, sure, Starlord goes ballistic but instead says: “Let me help you get that effing glove off so I can kick his ass man to scrotum-chin.”

But b/c Mothra is tickling Thanos’s memories the Mad Titan realizes what’s happening thanks to his grief being so powerful. So Thanos bellows, “Get out of my mind!”, regains his control and beats the piss out of everyone.

But when he says “get out of my mind” he has to say it in the exact same way as the Bene Gesserit Reverend Mother says it to Paul Muad’dib in Dune (the movie).

IMO, you get the same result with my half-assed scenario above w/o the “er, what?” record stop noise.

The Fight in the Blue Bubble of Stargate: Atlantis

And, to wrap up my Negative Nancy-ness, the whole battle scene in Wakanda was just dumb.

They make a big show of forming up ranks only to raggedly charge a force that greatly outnumbers them? That makes no sense to me.

Sure it allows the heroes to have some individual moments but those are yawningly predictable. Guess what, they win!

Why not have the bad guys break the shield wall and the heroes rally the troops to reform the wall. And…spoiler…why didn’t the bad guys just pummel Wakanda from orbit with very small rocks a la The Expanse (and Monty Python).

And, sure, Thor looks cool being the lightning and wielding his now over-sized hammer (Freud much?) but his actions on the battlefield are literally sound and fury signifying…nothing.

Someday, somehow, I will write a book with equally glaring errors and make a similar amount of cash as Infinity War.

Or, maybe I’m just being hyper-critical. After all, the movie was, on the whole, enjoyable.

Thoughts?

Random Thoughts on Infinity Wars

My son and I finally saw Avengers: Infinity Wars this past weekend. Fun movie. The following contains spoilers…and a few thoughts on the flick.

Thanos

He was done pretty well, both on the CGI and Brolin’s acting. Better than I expected, frankly. And having read Jim Starlin’s original Adam Warlock series years and years ago I was prepared to be disappointed.

But I gotta say, the Mad Titan’s rationale for wiping out half the universe was cooler in that old comic. Essentially, he did it b/c he was wooing Death. Based on this, it makes total sense as to why the movie’s creators didn’t run with Starlin’s original plot.

Nidavellir

In Norse myth, Nidavellir is one of the names for the home of the Svartalfar. The other is Svartalfheim. Nidavellir means the “low fields” or “dark fields.” See this site for more info.

In the movie, Nidavellir is both the home of the MCU’s giant dwarves and the forge where Mjolnir and now Stormbreaker were made. It was clever having the forge be a neutron star, but less so to have Tyrion Lanister play Eitri. (Though it was funny to have him be gigantic.)

Thor and Stormbreaker

First, Stormbreaker belongs to Beta Ray Bill!, Second, these dudes make a real Stormbreaker. If you’ve never watched Man at Arms Reforged then you’re missing out. Forged in Fire is good, too. I’ve learned quite a bit about blacksmithing and forging from those shows — enough to improve my fictional scenes that incorporate that stuff.

Eitri, Brokk and Sindri

The movie only includes Eitri, but there are other “dwarves” in Norse myth — there’s a long list of them in Voluspa (if memory serves). Two of the other important “dwarf” names are Sindri and Brokkr. All three are part of a myth that Snorri relates in the Prose Edda that deals with:

  • Loki cutting off Sif’s hair and getting forced to replace it
  • Loki wagering his head against the dwarves’ craftsmanship. Loki loses the bet, but through quick thinking keeps his head — only to get his mouth sewed shut. It’s a cool little tale.

The Svartalvar are heavily referenced in my first two books, they make an appearance in a “flashback” sequence (Kinsmen Die) and then directly appear in Book 3 (BK3). The Svartalvar are integral to the “mysterious device” plot arc that I introduced in Kinsmen Die.

And with that said, a future series that I’ve partially written (originally it was woven into the series I’m writing now) Eitri, Brokk and Sindri are three brothers who are “of the line of Sindri.”  That original Svartalvar is the one who forged/crafted the items used by the Aesir (as part of Loki’s wager) — Mjolnir, Gungnir, Draupnir, etc.

At the moment my Svartalvar are more like elves than dwarves, though I tried (and will continue trying) to avoid the Tolkien elf trope. Which is really a Svartalfar trope. Kinda.

That future series is equal parts prequel, contemporaneous and sequel to my current series. It’ll be fun pulling all the various threads together especially since I lose track of quite a few them until they reappear again…right before Ragnarok.